If you are a victim of intimate partner violence and
you want it to stop, you must reach out for help. Partners who resort
to violence in their relationships are getting their needs met and they
will do everything they can to keep you from telling their secret. If
people know what they do, then they know they will be judged harshly.
Abusers will try to convince you that the violence is your fault.
Dinner wasn’t ready on time, you wore a dress that was too revealing,
or you didn’t get the stain out of a shirt. None of these are reason
for you to be physically hurt by someone who is supposed to love you.

If
you reach out to others for help, then you will increase your support
network. Most people in abusive relationships have no support because
the abuser cuts them off from outside relationships. He has better
control that way. Tell people you trust and let them help you. If you
are still afraid, then talk to a women’s shelter. They will be able to
set you up in a safe house if you choose to leave. They should be
listed in your yellow pages under “domestic violence” or “crisis
intervention.” Stop the cycle. Get the support you need even if your
choice is to stay.

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